Removing Toxic People from Your Life (And How to Cope If You Can’t)
We all have that one person who seems to leave us emotionally drained, doubting ourselves, or carrying stress long after a conversation ends. Toxic relationships aren’t just found in dramatic fallouts or obvious betrayals—they can creep in subtly through manipulation, passive aggression, guilt-tripping, or constant negativity. Removing toxic people from your life is an act of radical self-love. But what happens when you can’t completely cut ties? Whether it’s a coworker, family member, or someone tied into your daily life, this blog will walk you through how to identify toxicity, take your power back, and protect your peace.
What Makes a Person Toxic?
Let’s be clear: being “toxic” doesn’t mean someone is evil or irredeemable. It means their behavior consistently harms your emotional well-being, undermines your self-worth, or sabotages your growth. Toxic patterns can include:
Gaslighting (making you doubt your reality)
Chronic criticism or belittling
Emotional dumping without reciprocation
Manipulation or guilt-tripping
Lack of accountability for their actions
Always making it about them
We all have bad days—but toxic people make it a way of life. If every interaction leaves you feeling worse, smaller, or more confused, it’s time to take a closer look.
Signs You’re Being Affected
Here’s what it might look like in your body, mind, and life when you’re around someone toxic:
You dread hearing from or seeing them.
You overanalyze your words after every interaction.
You feel anxious, depleted, or "not good enough."
Your self-esteem drops, especially around them.
You feel responsible for their feelings or moods.
If reading that made your stomach turn or someone popped into your mind—that’s your intuition speaking. Trust it.
When You Can Remove Them
If someone doesn’t live in your home, work directly with you, or share responsibility for someone in your care (like a child or elder), you usually can walk away—even if it feels impossible at first.
Here’s how to do it:
Get clear on why.
Write out how they make you feel, what patterns are present, and how your life will be better without them. This is your anchor when doubt creeps in.Set the boundary.
You can ghost, but often closure helps you more than them. Try:
“I’ve realized this relationship isn’t healthy for me. I wish you well, but I need space going forward.”Block access.
Delete their number, block on socials, and make a ritual out of reclaiming your space—burn their texts, clean your room, smudge your phone, whatever feels sacred.Expect backlash—and stay firm.
Toxic people may lash out or try to re-enter your life with promises, guilt, or drama. Your job? Stay grounded. “No” is a full sentence.
But What If You Can’t Remove Them?
Sometimes, cutting off a toxic person just isn’t an option—at least not immediately. Maybe it’s a parent, a boss, or a co-parent. In these cases, the work shifts from removal to emotional protection.
1. Detach emotionally.
You don’t have to engage every time they bait you. Think of it as putting on a raincoat during a storm—it still rains, but you don’t get soaked.
Try:
“I hear you.” (without agreeing or taking it on)
“I’m not available for this conversation.”
“Let’s talk when we’re both calm.”
Detach doesn’t mean you stop caring—it means you stop sacrificing your peace to manage someone else’s dysfunction.
2. Set and enforce boundaries.
Boundaries are limits you set for yourself, not rules to control others. For example:
“I don’t take calls after 8 PM.”
“If you raise your voice, I will end the conversation.”
“I won’t attend events where I feel unsafe.”
The key? Following through. Boundaries without action are just suggestions—and toxic people love to ignore suggestions.
3. Protect your energy.
Before and after interactions with toxic people, use energy hygiene techniques:
Ground yourself with deep breaths or meditation.
Visualize a protective light or bubble around you.
Journal or debrief afterward—don’t hold it in your body.
Move your body (walk, shake, dance) to release tension.
This isn’t “woo”—this is nervous system regulation. And it works.
Make a Plan for the Future
Even if you can’t walk away today, you can create a plan for how and when you will. Document your steps. Build support systems. Save money. Seek therapy or coaching. You deserve to live in a life where your nervous system can relax, not brace.
Don’t wait for things to get “bad enough.” The fact that you feel hurt, confused, or trapped is enough reason to take action.
Forgiveness Isn’t Required (But It’s Possible)
You do not need to forgive someone in order to heal. But forgiveness, when you are ready, can free you more than them.
It might sound like:
“I accept that they are who they are.”
“I release my need to change them.”
“I forgive myself for staying as long as I did.”
You don’t owe them anything—not closure, not conversation, not a second chance. You only owe yourself peace, clarity, and forward movement.
You Are Allowed to Choose Peace
Removing toxic people is hard because we’ve been conditioned to prioritize politeness over peace. But let’s be honest: no one benefits when you abandon yourself to keep the peace with someone who doesn’t care about your well-being.
You deserve relationships that feel safe, supportive, and reciprocal.
You are allowed to choose peace over obligation.
You are allowed to protect yourself, even from people who “mean well.”
You are allowed to say: Not anymore. Not me. Not here.
Final Thought + Gentle Reminder
Whether you’re releasing someone or learning to manage their presence, you’re not alone. So many of us are walking this same road—learning to honor ourselves, rewrite family dynamics, and stop betraying our inner peace for external harmony.
Be patient with your process. Some exits are quick. Others are slow dissolves. All are valid.
And if you need support navigating your healing, clarity, or boundaries…
👉 Book a blooming session or intuitive reading with me here. I’d be honored to hold space for your journey.
You are worth it. Always.
—Mary 🌙
💛 Ready to Put This Into Practice?
Releasing toxic energy is powerful—but it helps to have support.
That’s why I created a free worksheet and journal prompts set just for you. Whether you're setting new boundaries, reflecting on hard truths, or simply coming back to yourself, these tools will help you take aligned action.
✨ Inside, you’ll get:
🧹 A self-reflection worksheet to name and release toxic patterns
📝 Thought-provoking journal prompts to gain clarity, set boundaries, and reclaim your peace
👉 Click here to download your worksheet + prompts
You deserve to feel free, grounded, and whole. Let’s begin.