Trippin’

This probably won’t surprise you, but I am a person who follows my intuition. When I get a gut feeling or my interest is peaked by something, I follow it. 

It even surprised me when I saw my mother (The Saint) watching the rosary at Lourdes, and I was googling tours to Lourdes.

I’ve been told how my name came from a discussion between The Saint and my Grandmother about how my first name was Mary (after Mother Mary), and my middle name was Anne after Mary’s Mother, St Anne. No combining the names - it was decided. It was Mary Anne, not any combination of the two. Add in 12 years of Catholic School and an annulment; I seeped in Catholic upbringing and theory. 

Now, this also may not surprise you - the Catholic Faith is much more in the distance for me now. I respect it and will utilize prayers and rituals from Catholic tradition. However, there is much more to it for me, which will be a blog for another day.

Before I knew it, I sent my friend Maria the information about the Lourdes tour, which was over a year away. This was October 2021 and I have now committed to a two-week trip spanning Portugal, France, and Spain to many holy sites. I wasn’t going there with any expectations, but I felt like this was important. I wasn’t sure why and February 2023 seemed so far away that I put it back in my mind for now.

In between Oct 2021 and Feb 2023, I got divorced, broke off a rebound relationship, and was accepted into a Masters in Spirituality program at a Catholic College. All of these things cumulated within a week, by the way. Monday, Wednesday, and Friday passed, and my life significantly changed. And if you know me, this is the time you would say, “Well, you don’t do anything small, Mary.” (#truefacts, by the way.)

A week before my trip, my very Holy Aunt Thersa (yes, another Saint Theresa) wished me joy on the trip and told me my life would change. She had been on this tour twice and said it was an experience. I was skeptical. I believed her but didn’t know if I would experience that.

And yes, I did.

Let me tell you a few things I realized:

1. Everyone has their reasons for what they do.
   You hear some stories when you’re on tour with 50 people for 2 weeks. We got to know people and why they were there. Some were looking to get healed, some were there to give thanks, and some just wanted to visit Fatima, Lourdes, and parts of El Camino de Santiago (The Walk of St. James). This carries over to the day-to-day too. We all have our reasons for doing things. While we may not have the same reasons, we have the commonality of an important reason. I wanted to remember this, even when someone doesn’t seem pleasant.

2. No one owns the deities.
   Even though I would not call myself Catholic anymore, walking into places like  Lourdes and Fatima touched me. The feelings of love and acceptance there made my heart sing. While I sat in these holy places, I felt connected to the feeling associated with Mary - love, connection, and gentleness. Then the question came into my mind - who actually  “owns” Mary or any of the Divine?  If I go to Mary with a worry, would she be checking a list asking if I had donated to the spirituality I was dedicated to?  Do I have to be any part of the spirituality or religion to receive a blessing or even compassion? Nope, I sure don’t. 

3. Even when you think you can’t, you can.
   I was not in shape for all the walking on this trip, but I took it slow. Yes, there were times I was missing my pre-Covid fitness level. I was there, though, and I would take it one day at a time, one walk at a time. Not always easy, but I made it. (It wasn’t that bad, really.) But I almost psyched myself out of going because I had told myself I might be unable to do it. But once I told myself it would be fine, it was. I realized once I put my mind to something. I would find ways to do it, even if it weren’t pretty.

I have photos to share and will soon. But let me know if you had a trip or task that changed things for you. Change is always possible.